I have been on super wedding planning mode all week. I'm trying to get as much done before the summer as I can. One of my favorite sites that I keep going back to for ideas from invite wording to DYI projects to Father daughter dance songs that aren't sappy is Offbeat Bride. It is possibly the best wedding blog I've seen. I read Ariel's book and loved all her advice about having a non-traditional wedding. (I also laughed out loud many times while reading.) Finding the blog while searching through all the crap I kept finding online was the best discovery I made in my wedding planning. Simon and I are a bit of an offbeat couple, and we don't want a traditional wedding by any means. Finding this site and book was like the light at the end of an awful white and baby pink taffeta tunnel.
When we started to plan our wedding I think my mother was worried that we were going to elope and then I think she was worried that we would get married in a field barefoot with Simon in board shorts and a t-shirt and me in a dress that I crocheted out of soysilk. This fear then moved to accepting the fact that all we wanted was for our wedding to really be us. Not some cookie cutter wedding of what everyone else does. For example Simon and I are not having flowers at our wedding. It's not our thing and why spend hundreds of dollars on something that is just going to die and get thrown out. Also We are not having a first dance, Simon and I both agree that awkwardly dancing together while everyone else stands around and watches you is weird. Instead we are going to preform a song together.
Again there are some traditions we are keeping like I am wearing a white dress and we are planing on having lots of dancing at our reception. Our ceremony is secular, but we are having readings and an exchange of rings just no god stuff and not in a church. (Neither of us is religous so this makes sense to us.)
There are a few exceptions I have made for my family. I have given my mother full rein on the rehersal dinner. This way she can have it at her country club if she wants or at the house or down at the bar I'm not worried about it, because it is not my priority. I will also dance with my father, but not to butterfly kisses or anything of the like, that is my only request.
It's all about balance. Balancing your wants and your families expectations, explaining why you are doing it the way your doing it. I really think Offbeat Bride champions this. It's a wedding not your marriage it's one day in a lifetime of days. I do want to have fun, I do want it to be meaningful, and I do want to through a great party for all my friends, Simon and I just want to do it our way.
So thank you Offbeat Bride! Thank you for all the advice, great posts, tutorials, and wedding porn! Thank you for not making us Offbeat couples feel like total freaks when we do something out of the norm!
P.S. We may not be getting married in a field, but we are having our reception in a barn!